i.e. Chris vs Christopher
For example, restricting the use of photos, or social media posts.
- There are generally four periods in which music is played.
1. As guests arrive (background music)
2. Processional (as bride arrives)
3. While you sign the registry
4. Recessional (as newly married couple leave)
Ho Hey, Lumineers
Skinny Love, Birdy
Forever, Ben Harper
If yes, you will need someone to manage the playlist, timings etc on the day.
Presentation of the Bride
These days, the bride has many options apart from the traditional 'giving away' by her father. Some other options include:
The bride is not given away but walks herself down the aisle, or the bride can even be at the ceremony early, like the groom and they can welcome everyone and let the ceremony begin at a certain time.
The bride and groom together walk down the aisle, the bridal party may have arrived early or they could join them, perhaps leading the way. The bride is given away by an escort, perhaps a family member. This escort could walk her down the aisle to meet her groom, or could be with the guests already and respond when asked by the celebrant.
Both the bride and groom could be given away by each of their families, to the other, in a ceremony performed after walking down the aisle. This could even broaden to a question and response by the parents, involving them in the ceremony a little more than some.
The bride and groom can walk down the aisle themselves, having arrived together or the groom meeting his bride at the end of the aisle and escorting her the final leg, and as they get to their parents an exchange, whether formal, emotional, or even with a gift, can occur as a sign of honour and respect and thanks.
The traditional giving away of the bride involves the father walking the bride down the aisle and giving her to the bridegroom. To represent the modern version of the tradition the groom could thank the father as he reaches the alter, offering a handshake, high five or a hug and even verbally acknowledging him.
Another version could have the celebrant asking “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?” with the bride answering “She gives herself, but with her family’s blessing.”
If so, please describe
- Parents are very special to a bride and groom. They have helped shape life to this point. Their continued love and support are needed. You may want to give the parents of both the bride and groom the opportunity to publicly affirm your relationship.
Groom’s parents: We welcome ________ into our family and give our blessing to this marriage.
Bride’s parents: We affirm your relationship, welcome ________ into our family, and give our blessing to your marriage.
If so, please describe
Would you like the bridal party introduced?
If so, please give details - name, relationship. this is usually short and sharp as it's often done in further detail at the reception.
Personal Story of Bridal Couple.
These details will be gathered at our next meeting once this form has been submitted
Any readings, poems or symbolic ceremonies by friends and family please include below. Examples:
Love is an Adventure by Pierre Tielhart de Chardin
Love is an adventure and a conquest. It survives and develops like the universe itself only by perpetual discovery. The only right love is that between couples whose passion leads them both, one through the other, to a higher possession of their being. Put your faith in the spirit which dwells between the two of you. You have each offered yourself to the other as a boundless field of understanding, of enrichment, of mutually increased sensibility. You will meet above all by entering into and constantly sharing one another’s thoughts, affections, and dreams. There alone, as you know, in spirit, which is arrived through flesh, you will find no disappointments, no limits. There alone the skies are ever open for your love; there alone lies the great road ahead
The Apache Wedding Blessing
Now you will feel no rain
For each of you will be shelter to the other
Now you will feel no cold
For each of you will be warmth to the other
Now there is no more loneliness
For each of you will be companion to the other
Now you are two bodies
But there is one life before you
Go now to your dwelling place
To enter into the days of your togetherness
And may your days be good and long upon the earth
The Privileged Lovers by Rumi
The moon has become a dancer
at this festival of love.
This dance of light,
This sacred blessing,
This divine love,
to a world beyond
only lovers can see
with their eyes of fiery passion.
They are the chosen ones
who have surrendered.
Once they were particles of light
now they are the radiant sun.
They have left behind
the world of deceitful games.
They are the privileged lovers
who create a new world
with their eyes of fiery passion.
The Day Sky by Hafiz
Let us be like
Two falling stars in the day sky.
Let no one know of our sublime beauty
As we hold hands with God
Into a sacred existence that defies—
Every description of ecstasy
Ring Warming Ceremony
Rings can be passed around the room on a pillow or in a bag. The celebrant can explain a little about it right at the beginning of the ceremony.
Everyone holds the rings for a few seconds and says a little blessing/prayer for them. Then by the time you do your vows the rings have made their way all the way around the room and all your loved ones have given their blessings.
Handfasting is a simple and traditional ceremony used in Irish, Scottish, and Welsh weddings, which goes back to the medieval and renaissance period. It involves the tying of hands together to symbolize the coming together and remain tied together.
Unity Sand Ceremony
A symbolic blending of two different-colored sands into a single vessel. The blending of two different beings, into a single, inseparable unit that is their marriage — the joining of their lives. Hard as it would be to separate out those grains of sand, that’s how difficult it is to separate these two people. Multiple sand vessels can also be combined to include God or children.
Red String of Fate
An East Asian belief originating from Chinese legend and is also used in Japanese legend. According to this myth, the gods tie a red cord around the ankles of those that are to meet one another in a certain situation or help each other in a certain way. Often, in Japanese culture, it is thought to be tied around the little finger. The two people connected by the red thread are destined lovers, regardless of time, place, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break.
Actually “Tying the Knot”
Both the groom’s mother and the bride’s mother can present the couple with a long piece of thick ribbon or cord (2 different colors, maybe your wedding colors) which you will tie in a knot to symbolize the union of the two families. You can also plan to “tie the knot” every year on your anniversary with the same piece of ribbon/cord.
If so, please advise the name and who will perform it.
Monitum (The words I am required to say at your wedding)
Section 46 Certain authorised celebrants to explain nature of marriage relationship (1) Subject to subsection (2), before a marriage is solemnised by or in the presence of an authorised celebrant, not being a minister of religion of a recognised denomination, the authorised celebrant shall say to the parties, in the presence of the witnesses, the words:
“I am duly authorised by law to solemnise marriages according to law. Before you are joined in marriage in my presence and in the presence of these witnesses, I am to remind you of the solemn and binding nature of the relationship into which you are now about to enter. Marriage, according to law in Australia, is the union of two people to the exclusion of all others, voluntarily entered into for life.”
Asking (words you are required to say at your wedding)
Section 45 Form of ceremony (2) Where a marriage is solemnised by or in the presence of an authorised celebrant, not being a minister of religion, it is sufficient if each of the parties says to the other, in the presence of the authorised celebrant and the witnesses, the words:
“I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, A.B. (or C.D.), take thee, C.D. (or A.B.), to be my lawful wedded wife/ husband”
Some examples are below, but please contact me if you would like further ideas or assistance:
- I ___ take you ____ To have and to hold, from this day forward. For better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as we both shall live. This is my solemn pledge to you.
I, ____ take you _____to be my husband/wife. I promise to always be your biggest fan and your partner in crime. I promise to create and support a family with you, in a household filled with laughter, patience, understanding, and love. I vow not just to grow old together, but to grow together. I will love you faithfully through the difficult and the easy. What may come, I will always be there, each one believing that love never dies. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my life to keep.
Please specify if you will write your own vows, or if you prefer to repeat after me (and what that vow will be)
A few examples of words spoken during the ring exchange (there are many options you can explore):
GROOM/BRIDE, as you place the ring on BRIDE’s/GROOM's finger, please repeat after me: I give you this ring as a reminder that I will love, honor, and cherish you, In all times, In all places, And in all ways, forever.
BRIDE/GROOM, as you place the ring on GROOM’s/BRIDE's finger, please repeat after me: I give this ring to you, My beloved, my friend, my wife, As a symbol of my love and devotion for you.
BRIDE,/GROOM I give you this ring that you may wear it as a reminder of my love for you.
Please copy and paste from above or include your personal selection.
A couple of options:
With that I take great pleasure in pronouncing you husband and wife. (groom's name) you may now kiss your bride!
With that I take great pleasure in pronouncing you husband and wife. I now invite you to seal this marriage with a kiss.
Or you can be creative if you wish.
Signing of the marriage register and certificates
We will go to the signing table and you and the witnesses will sign 3 certificates, this takes about 5 minutes. If you want someone singing/juggling etc during this time, please let me know. This doesn't have to be done during the ceremony, it can be done after or even before. We can discuss this further if you wish.
Presentation of Couple to Guests
"It's my pleasure to present Mr & Mrs ___"
":For the first time as husband and wife, it's my pleasure to present BRIDE & GROOM" "
And now, to all the friends and family who have come to celebrate this union, I take great pleasure in presenting, for the first time anywhere, the newly married BRIDE and BRIDE"
Ways of presenting your names:
Mr and Mrs Groom &Bride last name
Mr and Mrs Bride & Groom last name
Mr & Mrs last name
Mrs & Mrs last name
Bride & Groom
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith.
Mr. and Mr. John Smith and Jack Jones-Smith
Is there anything you would like me to guide guests to participate in (such as throwing flower petals).
Any last announcements made by myself to your guests
"Please now head to the ___ while the bridal party has photos, reception begins at ___o'clock "
This is your day, you can do anything you like!
Feel free to call me if anything above requires clarifying or you have other ideas to discuss.
Are you comfortable with me posting photos of your wedding to social media (in the days following your wedding)? If so, please include any Instagram handles or Facebook profile names I can tag. Thanks!